fast and slow

I've been feeling a bit discombobulated. Last week Matthias' dad was visiting with his greyhound (it's always fun to have the three dogs together!). Matthias and I were both working, while also trying to savor the days.

On top of that I had a headache that just wouldn't go away. It hung around for about five days. By the time Monday rolled around I was exhausted.

If I had been fully paying attention I would have realized that my body was telling me to slow down. I'm not always so good at listening.

Last week I also kept trying to work on paintings of bachelor buttons and I kept getting frustrated as the paintings "failed."

I've talked before about sticking with a painting that doesn't seem to be "working". Sometimes the middle stages of a painting don't look right, but it's only part of the process and if I stick with it, things will turn around.

Sometimes, though, when a painting (or any endeavor) isn't working it's time to step away and do something else.

Again, a message to slow down. Again, I'm not always so good at listening.

So what's the answer?

I don't know if there is an answer. I think it's always a process. I've been thinking about Meda's comment about letting go on my post from the other day and Liz's perspective from her interview last week that "you don't find a balance, you just live". I've also been pondering what Ria Sharon said in her latest Secret Sketches email. Her prescription for July: "Drink lots of water. Take lots of naps." She suggests that we're more productive if we schedule some time to do nothing, whether it's napping or daydreaming.

I think she might be right. Sometimes when I go out to the garden with my sketchbook, I find more inspiration just sitting and being, than sketching.

Listening. Watching. Smelling. Touching. Tasting.

Noticing the joys of summer. Discovering little bits of magic. The first cicada song of the year. A garden friend in a flower pot.

The promise of the first cherry tomatoes.

I took some time on Sunday to stare up at the sky and watch the clouds.

I need to do more of that.

More being.

More savoring.

More slow.

I also took some time on Sunday to reorganize some of my paints in a new palette box. I took some time to paint swatches of color in my current watercolor sketchbook.

It's slow work. And satisfying.

When I came back to my painting table yesterday, although I was tired, the painting came easier.

It's a process. It's always a process.

I hope your week is filled with more slow than fast.